Taking the Long View: Face the Feelings, Deal with the Facts
Last week I discussed ways to get an edge on the fall term by planning for some of the alternatives and some of the uncertainties we could be facing.
This week, we are very close to decision time. Indeed, some of the scheduling and planning I talked about last week can’t be done until some decisions are made.
The drill here is straightforward:
- Face the feelings.
- Deal with the facts.
- Evaluate the alternatives.
- Decide.
Let’s look at the main decision issues I’m hearing about.
The biggest decision is
Do I really want to go to college this fall?
Maybe you gook a gap year, expecting that everything would be back to normal. In looking at the pros and cons of extending your gap year, I’d encourage you to face the feelings first, then apply your analytic mind to how your decision will affect your career, your life over the longer term. Gather any information that you need, do your pros and cons, cast and . . . Decide. Yes, you might not make a perfect decision, but at this time, in these circumstances, one of the worst decisions can very likely be to make no decision at all.
If you are looking at returning after an absence of a few years, or quite a few years, maybe the fear is that you have fallen behind in your area, or that your mind has lost the ability to learn, to retain detail. In the vast majority of cases, this is simply not a realistic fear. Acknowledge it, it’s a pretty normal fear, seek out expertise through counsellors or online research, and . . . Decide.
The next decision is
Do I want to go to online classes or in-person classes?
(This is assuming you have a choice.)
Delta brings fear back for many. It is not a foolish fear.
Another strong feeling a lot of us have is anger. Acknowledge it. You’ve done everything you were supposed to, followed the rules, and this situation should have been resolved by now! Anger at the university, at the health department, at people who insist you wear a mask, at people who won’t wear masks, at yourself for not making different decisions last year–acknowledge whatever anger you have, accept it’s pretty understandable.
Just don’t base your analysis on anger.
Get all of the information you can. Find out what your campus is doing to protect staff and students. Find out which courses are best taken in person that could be deferred for a term.
Do your pros and cons, including health risk, advantages of in-person colleague association, time and dollar cost of commuting, where your personal productivity is optimized, and . . . Decide.
These are the two decisions I hear most often. Here are others:
Do I want to change my major?
Do I want to get into residence? Is it time to look for an alternative?
Do I want to take a part-time job?
Do I want to switch my research focus?
All of these can be dealt with by the strategy outlined above: Feelings. Facts. Analysis. Decision.
If you are still in a state of indecision, take it one step at a time. Take these four steps and schedule them for each issue that needs deciding. Monday, list the fears, anger (and anticipation and hope). Then schedule getting the information you need, including deadlines. When you have the information, schedule both your analyses and the day on which you are going to make your decision.
If you try this, and it doesn’t work for you–let me know. I will buy you a virtual coffee and we can talk about it!
We’ve done it before, we’ll do it again! Connect with me: [email protected]